Just Not Into The Holidays

The holidays this year feels so strange for me. It doesn’t feel like the usual excitement.  This year I’m single, no kids around, my son is in another province, my family isn’t really into celebrating and I’m not feeling into the season.

No one to invite over, where in the past I would open up my house Christmas eve and have any family or friends over who wanted to drop in. I had a tradition of making meatballs in the crock-pot and anyone could make a meatball sub at their leisure as they arrived.  No real gift exchange, with the exception of a secret Santa with Heroclix friends and some money for my son to put towards his flight to come out next month.  In the past I’ve always been super excited to shop for friends and family and go crazy filling stockings and have family sleep over to open them all together in the morning.

So this year I’ve decided to focus on myself and not force myself into celebrating when I’m just not feeling in the spirit. It feels great that I don’t feel like I’m disappointing or upsetting anyone by not celebrating.  Certainly the opposite this year of what used to be the norm of wanting to make everything perfect and causing myself stress and anxiety for not living up to the perfection that I had in my head – even though I’m sure no one else expected that perfection.  So this year – no decorations going up.  No baking dozens of cookies. No buying presents or filling stockings.

My plan for Christmas this year is to just stay home, sleep in and stay in bed as long as I feel to, binge Netflix and my brother and I will make a dinner to enjoy together.  Have myself a rum and eggnog. That’s it.  No stress and no pressure.  Like it’s just another regular day off of work – in fact, Christmas this year actually falls on what would already be a day off.

Added January 2, 2019:

You know something?  This was the absolutely best holiday season for me.  The pressure was completely off and I feel so relaxed.  Sure, it was a little lonely and I felt a little selfish just thinking of myself and what I did and did not want to do, but I think my extended friends and family were fine with my decision.  They were busy with their own celebrations themselves.  I’m sure I would have pushed myself to do some celebrations if there were any little ones around to create magic for. However for this year, I don’t regret my decision even one little bit!

Have you ever skipped the holidays completely?  I’d love to hear how you felt and what you did if you decided to do something outside the norm of celebrations.

Until next time,